The deranged mind of everyone’s favourite ne’er-do-well
Ever want to experiment with paper snowflakes without the mess?
Ever want to take back a cut that ruined the whole thing?
This Flash is the answer! if only you could export the folded version for re-creation IRL.
Still, I loved this flash so much, I had to share.
Happy holiday! Eat a bunch and sleep a ton! Kisses!!
Oh, yeah, get a bit drunk while you’re at it and at home, and try to get some too!
So
We rented a truck (an abomination – some dodge 4-door with a smaller-than wanted bed. arg.)
We started up on Thursday evening, driving all the way into Ashland, OR. The Siskiyou pass was rocky, icy and snowing. We stayed at a best western where the desk clerk gave us a suite-ish room with a jacuzzi in the room. For $55. Yay off-season!
Next morning we got up and drove the rest of the way into Portland, arrived at the house at about 1:30pm, unpacked and checked the heater, etc. We had no bed to sleep in that night, so what do we do? Get a hotel room? No, no, no. We drive to Renton, WA to the IKEA and get our new bed. So 3 more hours in hellish traffic, and we arrive at the IKEA at about 6:30pm. We got this guy, Malm. So it took us about 2.5 hrs to get through Ikea with our stuff and we drove back at 9pm. I got horribly frustrated by the traffic and the confusing onramps just to get back on the 5. 3 hours back to home.
Because of the crap driving and everything, instead of going back to the house, we stopped in at Edgefield which is about a 5 mins drive from our house. There the ‘Luring” began. I swear that someone is setting a trap for me in Portland, carefully planning all these perfect things to happen and lure me there. I’m done waiting for the ‘other shoe’ to drop and I’ve decided to let Portland weave it’s magic spell. I had a McMenamin’s Stout, followed by a Whiskey they brew right there on the property. Both were excellent. The whiskey was quite ‘young’ – but it sure was great. I hope they put some away to age.
So back to the house, and We spend until 3:00am putting the bed together and we fall asleep.
Saturday 10:00 am, we go thrifting! Hit the gresham Goodwill (cleanest, best ordered goodwill ever!) – found some cool LPs, some glassware, and 2 chrome coffeepots. We then went to the Hawthorne to really good stuff – tremendous store. H saw a yarn store across the way, so we ventured there for some fun.
We then trundled home to drop off stuff and then picked up my friend Devin at his work at 4pm for hanging out and fun. I’ve not seen Devin for close to 8 years now, and we picked up right where we left off. We stopped by his place between hollwwod and belmont. We went out to Old Wives’ Tales on Burnside – I had a delicious spicy peanut veggie dish. Old Wives’ Tales is a vegen-veggie family friendly eatery. By family friendly, I mean it has both a play room and it is owned by a lesbian couple and it’s the best kind of unpretentious granola crunchy food: delicious.
We then went to Rimsky-korsakoffe – a little house turned coffee/desert place. Amazing. We met
Heather met us, and we headed out to gay clubs. YAY. we hit this place that is a combination of 3 other stores during the day. at night they are joined together for the club. Cheap cover, regular priced drinks, cute boys for miles (including Dan and Matt, who approached Heather because of her scarf – go Heather! Too cute.) We danced, drank, talked. Happiness. Then we were off to Silverado – $2 cover, cheapish drinks, and naked dancers – not shaved, tanned beefcake, but lean natural real guys. Dancing. Naked(ish). Most were very skimpy with occasional flashes, but a few went stark on the stage. Amazing. Delicious. My stripper cherry was popped with a few $1 bills in this adorable lean boys G-string. Yum. Then came last call. We dropped off D at his apartment, and headed home
Sunday morning we woke up, packed, met D for breakfast. He took us to this AMAZING place in the pearl that had travel kitch everywhere. H and D had Pumpkin Pancakes and I had my 2 eggs sunny side up (no one flinched, nice. I usually get heat for my ‘slimy’ eggs). Picked up some new tunes for the ride home (new Basement Jaxx RAWKS), headed home. 10 hours later at 11:00PM we rolled into home.
I want to be home very badly. And by home, I mean Portland. I’m homesick already and I haven’t even moved yet.
All I know is that this guy creeps the living fuck out of me. I see evil in his eyes. He was on TV this morning and I could smell the stink through the CRT. I know it’s just his speech, attitude, and visage, but maaaan He’s the Devil.
Composer Michael Kamen succumbed to his MS battle and kicked the bucket. Major Fucking Suckage.
Super keen day with the release of TTT:EE and all and I’m in the crankiest mood since I don’t know when.
I’m tired of being cranky and having little patience (perhaps a vicious cycle?) and I’m tired of being tired of being me.
Blah! Fuckitty Fuck Fuck. And yes,
New GIP; I call it “tipple.”
Just got back from a lovely quick lunch with
Then we went to Starbucks for coffee drinks, my taint continues to influence! Hahahah Coffee conquers all!
I’m feelin’ sassy today!
Who wants to take me on?